I don't wanna grow up!

So, today's thought/ question / query is... is being a grown up really just a series of procrastinations? Is it actually possible to have a completely unfettered moment with nothing looming over you? This morning I was angry and crying for being exhausted on a morning when I had a lot to accomplish. So, I got mad at myself for staying up too late the last two nights. Ok, honestly? I think I have stayed up too late for the last 4 billion nights. How many nights is every night since you were born??? 4 billion seems right. Why do I stay up late? Well, I think the reasons are simple 1) I don't want to miss anything i.e. the good part of the party/ book/ tv show/ email/the show that is coming on next etc. 2) I am a procrastinator extraordinaire. The act of procrastinating is such an art for me I procrastinate talking about or thinking about my bad habit of procrastination. Going to bed means giving up. Surrendering to the boring. I love sleep, but staying up is way cooler and more fun. Staying up late doing nothing in particular is my own personal protest to my lack of personal time.
I cannot think of a moment in a very long time where I had no commitments looming over me, or I was not doing my best to forget that I had a commitment looming over me. Do I pay for my procrastination? Yes, of course I do. Did I have to scramble to deal with laundry at 8 am this morning when I could have leisurely dried it and folded it last night instead of surfing the internet. Oh wait. I was surfing the internet about work, and finances, and talking on the phone about promotions for .. work. So while I was procrastinating the laundry, I was working. This morning I am blogging to you while procrastinating something else. Do all grown ups do this? Or are there people in the world who come home from work, eat dinner and watch tv and go to bed because they have very few commitments and did the laundry and vacuuming on the weekend??
Is this a personality thing? Did being born a high energy Sagittarius who does not suffer fools gladly make me like this? Could I ever be one of those people who works and comes home and does nothing and likes it? Or would I just be bored?

Today I say- BRING ON THE BORING!
The week I was diagnosed my joke was (after having no more than two years in the last 9 years without someone in my family having cancer) that I hope the next 10 years of my life is boring.
I have so much more to say, but I have a lot to do today, and task number one was already put off so I could stop and sit still and think and write this down.
I promised you pictures, I will get to it. I promise.

Poor Constuction worker?

I finally yelled at the workers who wake me up to move my car from the street at 7am in the morning on many occasions. He knocked 3 times today and on knock number 2 was told by my son to wait. On knock number 3 he got yelled at. I told him I was sick of them knocking on doors first thing in the morning when they knew the night before which days they needed cars off the street. I got the him to admit that on other sites they give out paper notices the night before they need cars moved and was not sure why they do not do that here. I reminded him that not everyone works 9-5 and is up by 7. I told him (and this was the first time I used the cancer card) I had been woken up for the last 5 months all the way through chemo and I was sick of how inconsiderate they have been and how terrible the site has been. He said he knows and that this construction project has been a problem because everything keeps changing.
So, even the construction staff knows this site is a mess! ?

Doin' the eyelash dance!

One wouldn't think eyelashes are all that important to their world.
I mean, how many times a day do you think about your eyelashes?
Sex, Chocolate,Cheese Doodles.. we all think about things multiple times throughout the day. But Eyelashes?
Well, try not having any...lemme tell ya.. it is pretty crazy.
So this week I have eyelashes long enough to wear mascara! They are still all stumpy and wierd looking, but they are getting there!
Little triumphs make me happy!

Apology accepted...

So, with an explanation that suggests a grand scale mis-communication amongst their volunteers I have had an apology from the political party mentioned in the previous post.The campaign manager and the candidate came in to talk to me about the events of the last few days. I explained all that blogged about yesterday. They apologized and explained the communication errors, and the fact that it was a coincidence that they parked in front of my store. They have however no explanation about the final email I received last night and do not know who sent it.

As the neighbourhoods have been filling up with signs for this candidate and that candidate.... I had an idea for a special sign I would like to put on my own lawn to express my thoughts about the elections on both sides of the border(I will be voting in both) After this I think I will perhaps pretend that politics don't exist and wear a big hat and sunglasses when I go to the polls.

Politics and me are like this......

So, I am sitting in my store after crying my eyes out because it was the only way to relieve the stress of a terrible terrible day.
So, this is how the day went:
I have to start at the beginning so you understand. Sometime last week I noticed a page on FaceBook about "Wellness Week". The local Dundas Wellness Week is an event held by the local business association, and lots of local businesses( including mine-Ellenoire) in the downtown area are participating- giving demonstrations, tastings, etc all discussing and displaying things surrounding wellness. On this facebook event page I discovered the info and photo that is used by the Business Association( hereafter referred to as the BIA) for their marketing campaign for the event. To my surprise it was not the BIA hosting this "event" on this page at all it was a local political party. On the page words stated on the page were/are: "Here is a list of the events that require our presence..." on this list were the events that my store is hosting amongst others.
My interpretation of the page is that there is a political party planning to place people in or near my store to "spread the word" about their parties message in the upcoming national election during events that my customers will be attending. I was not happy about this. I am in business to make money, not have conflict in my store with customers and political campaigners. My store feeds my son, my store pays my bills. My store is not a place for anyone, including me and my staff to make overt statements about their personal political choices. So, the idea of a party deciding without my permission that they will be attending the events in my store with the plan to "spread the word" to my clients made me angry. I wrote a note on their wall saying that no one campaigning would be permitted in my store without permission and I suggested they ask other businesses permission as well. It was clear I was unhappy about their presumptuousness but I was not unpleasant or mean. I also stated that this was not about my political opinion at all.

I expected backlash on the facebook wall, but I did not expect what ended up happening. My comment on the facebook wall was deleted, and was replaced with a statement that they would be "contacting all businesses before campaigning" In the spirit of social media the fact that they deleted my harmless comment was a little silly, but.... This afternoon at 12:30 I received a call from someone from this party. The tone of voice used by this person seemed to me to be confrontational. The call went something like this: Hi I am from the --------- party, and I am calling to tell you that we will be attending your event(s) during wellness week

So I asked if they were intending at attend as customers... and she said well we will come with 2 or 3 of us in our party t-shirts during your demonstration and just stand there, we won't be campaigning or anything and I said "well I would prefer you didn't"

and after a few more words then she hung up the phone.

I was quite upset, trying to imagine what might happen if these campaigners being here would cause any issue with my customers.
I called the head of the BIA to let her know about the facebook page. I was on the phone and 30 minutes after the phone call a car with several people in the party colours and campaign t-shirts pulled up to the parking spot in front of my store. After watching them for 15 minutes, talking amongst themselves and giving out a few of what appeared to be campaign flyers or cards I closed my store. I was so upset after the phone call that I wanted to be sure that my customers did not think that these people outside my store meant that I was affiliated with that party, or any party for that matter! For the next hour or so the party campaigners actively walked the street in party tshirts, carrying signs going in and out of stores using the car in front of my store as a base to get things in and out of. Once they were clearly not hovering around my store anymore I re-opened.
Throughout the day I remained quite upset. I had not eaten well, I was worried that my simple statement on the facebook page could escalate to these things. A phone call from someone "telling" me they were coming to my events, and a group of people parking right in front of my store.... what was going to happen next?
At 5pm, 4 hours after they arrived the party people finally drove away.
At 5:50 I received this email from an anonymous email address.
The email was entitled "Friendly" the body of the email said this:
FYI, for future reference The chief Electoral Officer indicates NO-One can limit campaigning on public property and store owners who try to do so are liable for $2000.00 fine or 6 months in jail.

Have a a great day!

As you can imagine an email with an implied threat like that upset me even more. My fears came true. It has escalated again. Is this Canadian Politics? Or does it remind you of anything else? All I know right now is that my voting choices just got easier. Whether these people that chose to make me feel threatened and like a prisoner in my own store today are following party rules I do not know. If the party constituent chose to chat with me today after finding out from the BIA rep that I had received the call and about the facebook issue then I may have given him the time to apologise, or even tell me his point of view. Instead, he walked by my store dozens of times knowing there was a conflict and he did nothing. Manners? No, not from anyone in that party today.

You tell me dear bloggy bits readers. What should I make of this?

Bloggy rainy thought for the day

So I am sitting on the porch in the rain, well I was until I came in to make a call about some beans at the farmers market that I forgot to ask T to get and to write this...
So, what I was on about....
I was sitting on the porch, with the rain falling down around me listening to nothing but the rain. It is a warm humid day with a lovely rain. Since I cannot turn into the frog I would like to be to continue my gardening(I don't think my animagus would be a frog anyway)I decided to read on the porch.
I was reading the September Vogue magazine and wishing I lived in New York City so I could go to the restaurants and buy all the clothes I see on those yummy glossy pages.
Then I realized that if I lived in New York City it would be unlikely I could sit on my porch and listen to nothing but the rain.
hmmmm

answers to questions I got on an email today, Do you know me better now?

I know you have all received emails with questions like this.... I have decided to answer the questions from this 'fun' email on here instead of on the email.

I won't be sending this out...

To anyone but my bloggy people.

Here we go.

Answers, by Noelle

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? My middle name is my mom’s maiden name, which is kind of lame, but some British tradition ..... Lumdsen?? can you imagine trying to explain that to a schoolyard full of white, blue collar 5 year olds? Honourable to my lineage I know but..... I already have to explain Noelle for pity's sake.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? An hour ago, but my blood sugar was low.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Don’t care, but yes I suppose

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Spiced ham with Garlic from Links

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Yup

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

Probably not, I talk too much, or so I am told and I don't like people who talk to much.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Rarely, don’t understand it either.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? NO, why would anyone really?

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I have to have a favourite? Ok, Alpen, Weetabix, Cap’n Crunch

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?

Yes, and it bugs me when other people don’t. Not during triathlons though.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Duh?!

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Again…. I have to have a favourite?

Ok, Glacier Berthillon in Paris all flavours, and real Ben and Jerry's made in Vermont

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? shoes

15. RED OR PINK? Red and Hot pink. Light pink looks crappy on most people but especially me.

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOU? My height.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Yolande

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK? No, don’t care- emails like this are dumb.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Black. They make pants and shoes in other colours?

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A tablespoon full of peanut butter- organic, no sugar, crunchy ….(sorry Ross)

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The Cocteau Twins

22. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW? Don’t really like TV anymore, but House, So you think you can Dance, Numbers,

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Skunk spray about an hour after the spray from about a block away (yes, totally serious) Tree Moss absolute, Labdunum, heliotrope flowers. You really want a perfume specialist to answer this one?

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? I hate the phone.

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?

Yes, but she sent me this dumb email, so I am not sure anymore.

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?

On TV? Or live?

Not hockey, Not football, Not baseball, Not tennis (although I can do it for a little while)

Not golf…. Ummm I liked the Olympics a little bit.

I like to watch triathlons in person.

27. HAIR COLOR? Hair? Ummmm? I think this question might make some people cry.

28. EYE COLOR? Brown, or so I thought before I lost all my eyebrows. Then they got lighter

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? no

30. FAVORITE FOOD? This week food bores me. Fave food? PB and J. All day all the time (sorry again Ross)

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Scary Movies are the stupidest things ever invented and I hate them.

Happy Endings? Only if the story needed to end happily.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED. Holes

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Black…. What do you think?

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?

You mean what is it outside right now?

Or which one do I like? It is summer outside. I like all seasons. Weather does not affect me. I look out the window, I dress accordingly.

35. HUGS OR KISSES? Unless I know you really really well I actually would prefer you don’t touch me at all and ya I am dead serious.

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Ok, again with the favourites thing.

As long as it has real chocolate in it, I will likely eat it and will be polite about liking it whether I do or not.

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? To this email? The one I am not sending to anyone? What do you think?

38. Least LIKELY TO RESPOND ? NEXT!

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Can’t remember the title, it is about 18^th century London and an apothecary.

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Don’t use one

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Nothing, I did dishes and made plum jam

42. FAVORITE SOUND? Silence

43. BEATLES OR ROLLING STONES? Beatles

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? France and Chemo... they were both far far away. France was nice though.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? I sing better than most people know.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Saskatoon

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?

Not sending this to anyone…. I keep telling you that.

Cheers!

N

I had 4 BC/ cancer/chemo people in my world today. A new employee at the food shop across the street from my store pointed at my head and said "chemo?" and told me that she had BC and chemo and recon.... in .. well she could not remember what year.. it was a kind of funny. Then I had a woman in a wig ( yes, sadly I can almost always tell which I why I don't wear one) come in about some skincare stuff that I market for chemo-ed out skin ( which is still stuck at f*$&/@ing customs) but we had a good chat and I sent her to this site because her support group ended..?! Then I had another person with a type of lymphoma who has seen me on TV, and after she paid for her soap she gave me a BC t-shirt that she said "I bought this for myself, but will never wear it- so i thought you should have it" Theeeeen I had another woman who had curly hair from chemo, but insisted on arguing with me about her hair for about 20 minutes (I am a pain in the ass about curly hair when people argue with me, I warn them from the beginning of the demo/sales pitch and I always win every argument they throw at me)

It was an interesting day.

I have to take a pic of my hair for you, I look like a very funny little bird with a strange shadow of eyebrows.

Locke St festival this weekend!!!! Saturday the 6th

Come and see me, we will be in front of the Transit Gallery at 230 Locke st south in Hamilton.

Holy crap!

It's been a week already???
I work,
I Twitter( microblogging, see the feed to the right),
I blog in my head all the time. If there was a way to auto feed my thoughts into my blog I could avoid this typing thing that hurts my hands anyway. Between my nails falling off....( oh yes my nails are falling off!!!) from the chemo and the fingertip pain from the chemo and this new strange phenomenon of my hands hurting after any activity that I use them a lot. i.e. swimming, gardening... mmmm typing!!!
I guess when my mom's nails were a mess near the end of her chemo I did not understand why... but now I understand that nails are also a fast growing cell just like hair so why wouldn't they get damaged???

So this last few weeks has been nuts! Trying to have fun before summer ended, trying to train for the potential of racing this triathlon, trying to spend time with my kid etc etc. Oh, and then there is this annoying work thingy that keeps getting in the way! I was on TV last Thursday on CH Morning Live, and dragged my tired ass to the EX with Luke and his pal. Thanks to the construction workers here in the Witherspoon hell pit I did not get a nap. So up at 4:30am, work for 3 or so hours, then off to 7 hours of walking on concrete. Have I ever mentioned I hate junk food ( well except for cotton candy and it is not on my diet) and rides?? So imagine me at the freakin' EX! ?

We have yet another street festival coming up this weekend- The Locke Street festival Sat Sept 6th. Drop in, say hi, rub my fuzzy (yup, you could actually call it fuzz now, not stubble!) head and then, well you know.... buy something!

So, about this triathlon thing. I did it.
I raced the darned Women's Tri( super-sprint distance 375m swim, 10km bike, 2.5km run) in Milton on Sunday.
I had a "Swim Buddy" to help me through the swim portion just in case I freaked out. God love her, but I may have been faster if she did not chat with me the whole time. But hey! I was there to prove I could race again... so I listened to her chat. The bike portion was a breeze (I hate to say this, because now y'all won't think I am sick anymore) and the run suuuuuucked. Running has been and will remain my hardest sport of the 3. I may be a slow swimmer, but it does not really scare me anymore. Cycling? well how could that be hard? Running? in the sun( curse the women's tri for moving the course into the open sunshine- the old course was waaaay better) wa hot and hard. I pulled a Whitfield at the end, and tried to sprint to the finish, but had nothing left and let the girl behind me pass at the last minute. So, I had my kid run the last 50m holding my hand... but I did it.


I finished a triathlon 6weeks and 3.5 days after my last chemotherapy. Ya hear that cancer???

The studies say that ( quoted from my smartypants swimmy pal in my BC support group)

"women who stay, or become, physically active after being dx'd with BC have a better chance of survival. They're talking about a reduction in the risk of death of 67% from 2 or 3 hrs of "brisk walking" per week during the year before and 2 years after dx. Women who were "sedentary" pre-dx could reduce their risk of death by 45% if they increased their level of activity to 2 or 3 hrs of brisk walking per wk during the 2 yrs after dx.

This is the original article: M.L. Irwin, et al. "Influence of pre- and postdiagnosis physical activity on mortality in breast cancer survivors: The health, eating, activity, and lifestyle study." Journal of Clinical Oncology 26(24):3958-3964 (Aug. 20, 2008). It was highlighted in a lot of news releases this past week"

So cancer? I will take your walking "2-3 hours of walking briskly" and raise you by 2-3 hours of triathlon training. SO THERE!

I am off to some hand hurting gardening ( y'all know how much I love the garden right?) in the last 3 hours of day 1 with my kid in school.

Shout out to my mom's late in life pal Jeff Goodes host of CBC radio's Fresh Air, apparently a note about me and the tri got to him and he mentioned it on the air on Sunday morning. If any of you heard it tell me all about it. Thanks Jeff!!!

Cheers, and I wil post pic later.. I pwomise!

N

P.S. I added a pic for you! see above