Hi everyone. I wrote this earlier this week for FaceBook. I am going to copy it here for a bunch of reasons: I don't feel much like writing. I am a little tired, a little annoyed with the cancer stuff this week(more on that later, I just got off the phone with yet another rude person at the cancer centre) and I just found out an old friend died today. Not someone I knew well, not since I was a kid... just someone from an important place...
So, here is your challenge.
No, it does not involve telling me what google tells you what you need. It does not involve me asking you to give me one work answers about anything or telling me 25 things about yourself.
It's actually a little dumber than that...
I don't watch many movies, so I am not doing the challenge about how many movies I have seen. I saw the tail end of the movie "The Breakup" tonight and caught the title music. There was a version of "The Rainbow Connection" that I had never heard before. You know that song?(like or hate it).. the one Kermit sang in "The Muppet Movie"?
I loved this version by an a capella group called the Tone Rangers..so I found it.. and it made me cry. That ridiculous song has made me cry for as long as I can remember. I found a ton of versions! I guess I never thought about it.. but I guess a lot of people like it.. or something...
Your challenge?
Find me a version that doesn't make me cry. Here are the ones I have so far...
The Original: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eubQfKYFOPc
Kermit and Debbie Harry:
Dixie Chicks:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzoZhb7ELNI
Kenny Loggins and Thomas the Tank Engine?? : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qF1DHcBoti0
Willie Nelson... can make me cry?? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oX9E_D_HjBo
Heartland Men's Chorus: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3qU2xC8gqc
(nice clean Harmonies guys!)
Tone Rangers from the movie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAuJZXlo2jE
( love these guys! as always addicted to a capella music)
ok.. it's your turn!
Ya, I know this is a ludicrous challenge!
So, there it is. My lazy blog post for the day. I hope Brian's family can see the rainbow today. More later or soon.. or something.
Love, Me
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
To Foob or not to Foob?
I don't really have a question... it is just a funny thought. As I have told u bloggy readers b4 I only wear my foob(fake boob=f-oob) when I feel like it. My foob is heavy and strangely enough droops more than my real one. It hurts to wear on my scar somedays and some clothes just do not work with the mastectomy bra. Wait... who the hell am I kidding? Some clothes don't work with the mast bra, or the foob! So last week I went back to working out regularly. I have been doing Pilates since the fall, but the store has kept me so busy I have not had time to do much else other than the occasional snowshoe trip down the rail trail. My Pilates girls know about the cancer and I just show up with no foob and no one says anything.
My trainers gym is pretty quiet, and the women there know me. Until yesterday my trainer had a new student work with me. It was a high school aged boy who comes in to help and learn. Poor kid did not know where to look.
Tonight at Pilates there was a woman waiting for the next class to begin while we were still working out. It is a pretty open concept studio. Again, she did not know where to look. Funny .. you know. I don't care at all what people think, and will continue to do what I like but I wonder. I wonder what goes through peoples heads when they look at me in a little black tank top all flat and deformed( my underarm area is very swollen from the lymph node removal and sentinal node biopsy a feckin year ago!)on one side, and pretty much normal on the other. Not that I did not know this, but I guess I don't look like the typical BC patient/ survivor/ warrior whatever.
My trainers gym is pretty quiet, and the women there know me. Until yesterday my trainer had a new student work with me. It was a high school aged boy who comes in to help and learn. Poor kid did not know where to look.
Tonight at Pilates there was a woman waiting for the next class to begin while we were still working out. It is a pretty open concept studio. Again, she did not know where to look. Funny .. you know. I don't care at all what people think, and will continue to do what I like but I wonder. I wonder what goes through peoples heads when they look at me in a little black tank top all flat and deformed( my underarm area is very swollen from the lymph node removal and sentinal node biopsy a feckin year ago!)on one side, and pretty much normal on the other. Not that I did not know this, but I guess I don't look like the typical BC patient/ survivor/ warrior whatever.
New Blog for ellenoire
I will not be abandoning this blog I promise!
but I have created a new blog just for the store
Check it out!
http://ellenoire.blogspot.com/
but I have created a new blog just for the store
Check it out!
http://ellenoire.blogspot.com/
Thursday, January 29, 2009
more questions?
My Breast Cancer Support group keeps making me do these!!!
;)
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
I think there is some religious thing to do with my name ;P
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
Last night in the car, it was some Fiddle music that made me do it.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Sometimes, but mostly when I use a fountain pen. Come to think of it, I need a new fountain pen.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Links Spiced Ham with Garlic aka Krakowska with Garlic
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
One boy
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Maybe, but man I would get tired of my long ass stories!
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
Occasionally( see #1) but I cannot hear it. I am the Ultimate straight man. Who’s on second? Then WHO is on third? Really Sarcastic people rarely stay friends with me. I do not laugh at their jokes and I always think they are mean to me...
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Not likely…
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Sugary Cereal: Captain Crunch, Healthy cold cereal: Alpen with Hemp Seeds
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Sometimes… mostly.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
Incredibly, but I fecking hate it when people tell me I am
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Baskin and Robbins Daiquiri Ice, and Ben and Jerry’s Coffee Coffee Buzz Buzz, and anything by Berthilon in Paris
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
The way they walk, then Hair, then shoes, then eyes
15. RED OR PINK?
Red, or Deep Fushia
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
I’m too short and my boobs are too small…. Umm oops.. I mean my boob is too small. Oh and I yell at my kid too much.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
Yolande
18. WHAT IS THE PAUL MCKENNA TECHNIQUE THAT YOU NEED TO WORK ON THE MOST?
Who the Hell is Paul McKenna?
19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Black
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
An orange
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The Radio. I am at work so it is boring music.
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Dark Purple
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Today? Labdanum or Boronia
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My dad
25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?
One of each please. No neighbours at Either
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
Sports on TV suck, but if I have to … Triathlon, Running, Cycling, X-country skiing
27. HAIR COLOR?
Brown-like
28. EYE COLOR?
Dark Dark Brown
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Only fun ones when I go out
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Filet Mignon Medium-Rare, Curried Chicken, PB and J
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary Movies annoy the hell out of me.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The Other Bolyn
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Pink LOL!
34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Both
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Mostly I only let people touch me because it makes them feel good with rare exception.
My favourite button says “Don’t you dare Hug me!”
36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
Chocolatey stuff, but I am VERY fussy about the quality so I mostly make my own desserts.
37. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?
Umm… only stupid people would choose only one. EVERYONE should be doing both
38. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?
Both, on at the same time
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Emma, Jane Austen
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
No Mousepad
42. FAVORITE SOUND?
Silence or no man made sounds. The Silence of Nature is good
42b: LEAST FAVORITE SOUND?
The alarm clock
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Beatles
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Loire Valley, France
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
Lots of them
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Saskatoon, Saskatchwan
47. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?
Dundas, Ontario
48. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?
Ugly grey with black trim
49. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR?
Cars have colours? It is just a box with wheels that gets me places
50. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 50 QUESTIONS?
No, and this one took me three tries because my browser kept locking up.
;)
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
I think there is some religious thing to do with my name ;P
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
Last night in the car, it was some Fiddle music that made me do it.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Sometimes, but mostly when I use a fountain pen. Come to think of it, I need a new fountain pen.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Links Spiced Ham with Garlic aka Krakowska with Garlic
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
One boy
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Maybe, but man I would get tired of my long ass stories!
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
Occasionally( see #1) but I cannot hear it. I am the Ultimate straight man. Who’s on second? Then WHO is on third? Really Sarcastic people rarely stay friends with me. I do not laugh at their jokes and I always think they are mean to me...
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Not likely…
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Sugary Cereal: Captain Crunch, Healthy cold cereal: Alpen with Hemp Seeds
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Sometimes… mostly.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
Incredibly, but I fecking hate it when people tell me I am
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Baskin and Robbins Daiquiri Ice, and Ben and Jerry’s Coffee Coffee Buzz Buzz, and anything by Berthilon in Paris
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
The way they walk, then Hair, then shoes, then eyes
15. RED OR PINK?
Red, or Deep Fushia
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
I’m too short and my boobs are too small…. Umm oops.. I mean my boob is too small. Oh and I yell at my kid too much.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
Yolande
18. WHAT IS THE PAUL MCKENNA TECHNIQUE THAT YOU NEED TO WORK ON THE MOST?
Who the Hell is Paul McKenna?
19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Black
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
An orange
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The Radio. I am at work so it is boring music.
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Dark Purple
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Today? Labdanum or Boronia
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My dad
25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?
One of each please. No neighbours at Either
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
Sports on TV suck, but if I have to … Triathlon, Running, Cycling, X-country skiing
27. HAIR COLOR?
Brown-like
28. EYE COLOR?
Dark Dark Brown
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Only fun ones when I go out
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Filet Mignon Medium-Rare, Curried Chicken, PB and J
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary Movies annoy the hell out of me.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The Other Bolyn
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Pink LOL!
34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Both
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Mostly I only let people touch me because it makes them feel good with rare exception.
My favourite button says “Don’t you dare Hug me!”
36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
Chocolatey stuff, but I am VERY fussy about the quality so I mostly make my own desserts.
37. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?
Umm… only stupid people would choose only one. EVERYONE should be doing both
38. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?
Both, on at the same time
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Emma, Jane Austen
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
No Mousepad
42. FAVORITE SOUND?
Silence or no man made sounds. The Silence of Nature is good
42b: LEAST FAVORITE SOUND?
The alarm clock
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Beatles
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Loire Valley, France
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
Lots of them
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Saskatoon, Saskatchwan
47. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?
Dundas, Ontario
48. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?
Ugly grey with black trim
49. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR?
Cars have colours? It is just a box with wheels that gets me places
50. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 50 QUESTIONS?
No, and this one took me three tries because my browser kept locking up.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
stuff about me chain note from FaceBook
This is a chain note; I've seen a couple of variations. I keep meaning to do this and never get my thoughts together to get it done.
Once you’ve been tagged, you're supposed to write a note with 16 (or pick some other number) random things about yourself. They can be trivial or momentous. At the end, choose 16 (or however many - see above) people to be tagged. But: you have to tag the person who tagged you. (Heck, I tagged you because I want to know more about you!)
1) I have spent no less than 5 hours thinking about what to write in this note. I do this a lot: postpone projects big and small because my head thinks about them sooo much and how to make them right I never get them done at all. I do this with everything: what to wear, what you think of me, what to do with my time. Most people don’t think I care about what other people think…. I think I care too much!
2) I could never be in a relationship with anyone with a peanut allergy. I would starve if it was not for peanut butter. Preferably no sugar added, crunchy with homemade jam on brown bread. I will occasionally go back to my roots and eat one with commercial crappy PB, store bought jam on white bread... but those only taste good if I have Campbells soup to go with...this is what I ate for almost every lunch during elementary school except for the store bought jam part. My mom always made jam which was often so runny it ran down your arm when you ate a sandwich.
3) I would really love to live in a house where it was neat and clean and things were put away but I don't know how. I did not grow up in a very organized or clean house both of my parents sucked at it. I liked growing up in a chaotic house because it was fun... but man that place was a mess! I wish someone (who would not throw all the stuff I love away) could come and teach me how to have a clean and organized house.
4) Every day I think how cool it would be if Colin and Justin came and redid my house. Just like everyone on their TV show I would be scared they would give me an orange bedroom or a beige living room or something else hideous. I took pictures of my house a year ago to send in to their show. See #1 for the reason I have not sent them in yet.
I think Colin and Justin are totally amazing and their Scottish accents make me miss my Mom.
5) My favourite colour is purple. The kids in school thought I was weird that I did not like blue or pink or other boring colours. Yes, I liked Donny Osmond, still do. I wore many pairs of purple socks and went to summer camp once and slept with his picture from Tiger Beat magazine under my pillow.
6) I swear a lot. No big surprise to anyone who knows me. My mother did too. Kerry Freeman and I decided in grade 6 I think it was to swear. We were on the playground after school one day and decided together to start swearing.
7) Bad manners make me blind with anger and I pray that bad manners are one of the things people don’t think I have. I want to run a manners school for kids. This generation makes me crazy. My parents were hardcore about manners: eat with your mouth closed, talk softly, walk quietly etc. Ironic that my mother drank and swore like a sailor and my father thought (and still does) it was ok to answer the front door in his underpants.
8) I am going to post this on my blog. Everytime I write something on FaceBook or to my support group and copy it onto my blog I feel guilty that I am not giving everyone original material and being lazy about not spending the time on each separate medium.
9) I love to sleep but wish there were 24 hours in a day. I stay up very late each night ( go back to #1 to see what I do with that time) watching bad TV, surfing the web, working on my business and playing with bath products and stuff.
10) I am teaching myself to like taking baths. I own a company that sells Bath products and HATE taking baths. I wonder if I could make a fortune creating a bathtub that I found comfortable enough to stay in for more than 10 minutes
11) I think I am lazy, I NEVER get enough done in the course of the day to feel satisfied. Going to bed before everything is done feels like failure to me. See #9.
12) I have a very addictive personality but learned a lot about myself when I gave into cigarettes and cocaine. Cigarettes were cool and tasted good…Cocaine made my never quiet brain get quiet but never for long enough. I quit Cigs for my kid. I quit cocaine because it made getting anything done totally impossible and holy shit the people that I met while using it were complete morons. I don’t like morons.
13) I always feel like I have useful info to share with people that would help them ie: stop using sulfates in your hair and it will look nicer, you will run faster if you learn chi-running, you will lose weight if you follow the program I used to lose 40lbs, Your curly hair would look better if you learn my way etc etc. Now that I run a business that I can share info with people that will help them I feel guilty that I will make money helping them. I try really hard not to tell my friends about the stuff I know or can do that would help them because I don’t want them to think I am trying to make money off them. .. But then I get mad that they are doing stuff the hard way and wish I could help them… and then I feel guilty…. Which is why I suck at marketing my company.
14) I want to start a group for people with cancer in my area that helps cancer patients exercise together during and after treatment. My mom started a group for stay- at-home mom’s to exercise together and it is still running 40+ years later. I have an odd feeling the groups will end up being similar.
15) I like you, lots and lots of you. I cannot mention/tag all the people I like in this note. I have a blog post I want to write that makes all the people who read all the stuff I write to tell them this. See #1 about this… I have been thinking about this post for months….
On the flipside I am deeply, painfully sad and angry that I lost some people from my life when I got cancer. I have always been known as the person who stays in touch with everyone from all parts of her life. When I got sick I could not keep this up. FaceBook helped but I did not have the time to do it. I am really mad that some people just did not bother to keep in touch with me while I was sick.
16) I think I am not very smart. Although somehow I have managed to run a business for the last 8 years with no real education I still think I am dumb. I only barely made it through high school and failed out of college. In hindsight I know it was because I was bored and thought everyone else.. mostly my teachers were dumb. Sadly, since I was raised to believe authority figures are to be trusted I actually listened when those same teachers told me I was dumb…..
17) I wish I could sing more. I wish I was better at singing in public. I sing alone all the time. I was in a choir from the time I was 4 until I was about 28. I sang a few solos here and there but when I tried to sing at weddings and funerals and stuff I start to cry for some unexplained reason. I know for sure it is some deep emotional reaction I have no control over. I might need shock therapy so I can sing solo in public...
18) I think I took this exercise too seriously
Once you’ve been tagged, you're supposed to write a note with 16 (or pick some other number) random things about yourself. They can be trivial or momentous. At the end, choose 16 (or however many - see above) people to be tagged. But: you have to tag the person who tagged you. (Heck, I tagged you because I want to know more about you!)
1) I have spent no less than 5 hours thinking about what to write in this note. I do this a lot: postpone projects big and small because my head thinks about them sooo much and how to make them right I never get them done at all. I do this with everything: what to wear, what you think of me, what to do with my time. Most people don’t think I care about what other people think…. I think I care too much!
2) I could never be in a relationship with anyone with a peanut allergy. I would starve if it was not for peanut butter. Preferably no sugar added, crunchy with homemade jam on brown bread. I will occasionally go back to my roots and eat one with commercial crappy PB, store bought jam on white bread... but those only taste good if I have Campbells soup to go with...this is what I ate for almost every lunch during elementary school except for the store bought jam part. My mom always made jam which was often so runny it ran down your arm when you ate a sandwich.
3) I would really love to live in a house where it was neat and clean and things were put away but I don't know how. I did not grow up in a very organized or clean house both of my parents sucked at it. I liked growing up in a chaotic house because it was fun... but man that place was a mess! I wish someone (who would not throw all the stuff I love away) could come and teach me how to have a clean and organized house.
4) Every day I think how cool it would be if Colin and Justin came and redid my house. Just like everyone on their TV show I would be scared they would give me an orange bedroom or a beige living room or something else hideous. I took pictures of my house a year ago to send in to their show. See #1 for the reason I have not sent them in yet.
I think Colin and Justin are totally amazing and their Scottish accents make me miss my Mom.
5) My favourite colour is purple. The kids in school thought I was weird that I did not like blue or pink or other boring colours. Yes, I liked Donny Osmond, still do. I wore many pairs of purple socks and went to summer camp once and slept with his picture from Tiger Beat magazine under my pillow.
6) I swear a lot. No big surprise to anyone who knows me. My mother did too. Kerry Freeman and I decided in grade 6 I think it was to swear. We were on the playground after school one day and decided together to start swearing.
7) Bad manners make me blind with anger and I pray that bad manners are one of the things people don’t think I have. I want to run a manners school for kids. This generation makes me crazy. My parents were hardcore about manners: eat with your mouth closed, talk softly, walk quietly etc. Ironic that my mother drank and swore like a sailor and my father thought (and still does) it was ok to answer the front door in his underpants.
8) I am going to post this on my blog. Everytime I write something on FaceBook or to my support group and copy it onto my blog I feel guilty that I am not giving everyone original material and being lazy about not spending the time on each separate medium.
9) I love to sleep but wish there were 24 hours in a day. I stay up very late each night ( go back to #1 to see what I do with that time) watching bad TV, surfing the web, working on my business and playing with bath products and stuff.
10) I am teaching myself to like taking baths. I own a company that sells Bath products and HATE taking baths. I wonder if I could make a fortune creating a bathtub that I found comfortable enough to stay in for more than 10 minutes
11) I think I am lazy, I NEVER get enough done in the course of the day to feel satisfied. Going to bed before everything is done feels like failure to me. See #9.
12) I have a very addictive personality but learned a lot about myself when I gave into cigarettes and cocaine. Cigarettes were cool and tasted good…Cocaine made my never quiet brain get quiet but never for long enough. I quit Cigs for my kid. I quit cocaine because it made getting anything done totally impossible and holy shit the people that I met while using it were complete morons. I don’t like morons.
13) I always feel like I have useful info to share with people that would help them ie: stop using sulfates in your hair and it will look nicer, you will run faster if you learn chi-running, you will lose weight if you follow the program I used to lose 40lbs, Your curly hair would look better if you learn my way etc etc. Now that I run a business that I can share info with people that will help them I feel guilty that I will make money helping them. I try really hard not to tell my friends about the stuff I know or can do that would help them because I don’t want them to think I am trying to make money off them. .. But then I get mad that they are doing stuff the hard way and wish I could help them… and then I feel guilty…. Which is why I suck at marketing my company.
14) I want to start a group for people with cancer in my area that helps cancer patients exercise together during and after treatment. My mom started a group for stay- at-home mom’s to exercise together and it is still running 40+ years later. I have an odd feeling the groups will end up being similar.
15) I like you, lots and lots of you. I cannot mention/tag all the people I like in this note. I have a blog post I want to write that makes all the people who read all the stuff I write to tell them this. See #1 about this… I have been thinking about this post for months….
On the flipside I am deeply, painfully sad and angry that I lost some people from my life when I got cancer. I have always been known as the person who stays in touch with everyone from all parts of her life. When I got sick I could not keep this up. FaceBook helped but I did not have the time to do it. I am really mad that some people just did not bother to keep in touch with me while I was sick.
16) I think I am not very smart. Although somehow I have managed to run a business for the last 8 years with no real education I still think I am dumb. I only barely made it through high school and failed out of college. In hindsight I know it was because I was bored and thought everyone else.. mostly my teachers were dumb. Sadly, since I was raised to believe authority figures are to be trusted I actually listened when those same teachers told me I was dumb…..
17) I wish I could sing more. I wish I was better at singing in public. I sing alone all the time. I was in a choir from the time I was 4 until I was about 28. I sang a few solos here and there but when I tried to sing at weddings and funerals and stuff I start to cry for some unexplained reason. I know for sure it is some deep emotional reaction I have no control over. I might need shock therapy so I can sing solo in public...
18) I think I took this exercise too seriously
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
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