stuff about me chain note from FaceBook

This is a chain note; I've seen a couple of variations. I keep meaning to do this and never get my thoughts together to get it done.
Once you’ve been tagged, you're supposed to write a note with 16 (or pick some other number) random things about yourself. They can be trivial or momentous. At the end, choose 16 (or however many - see above) people to be tagged. But: you have to tag the person who tagged you. (Heck, I tagged you because I want to know more about you!)

1) I have spent no less than 5 hours thinking about what to write in this note. I do this a lot: postpone projects big and small because my head thinks about them sooo much and how to make them right I never get them done at all. I do this with everything: what to wear, what you think of me, what to do with my time. Most people don’t think I care about what other people think…. I think I care too much!

2) I could never be in a relationship with anyone with a peanut allergy. I would starve if it was not for peanut butter. Preferably no sugar added, crunchy with homemade jam on brown bread. I will occasionally go back to my roots and eat one with commercial crappy PB, store bought jam on white bread... but those only taste good if I have Campbells soup to go with...this is what I ate for almost every lunch during elementary school except for the store bought jam part. My mom always made jam which was often so runny it ran down your arm when you ate a sandwich.

3) I would really love to live in a house where it was neat and clean and things were put away but I don't know how. I did not grow up in a very organized or clean house both of my parents sucked at it. I liked growing up in a chaotic house because it was fun... but man that place was a mess! I wish someone (who would not throw all the stuff I love away) could come and teach me how to have a clean and organized house.

4) Every day I think how cool it would be if Colin and Justin came and redid my house. Just like everyone on their TV show I would be scared they would give me an orange bedroom or a beige living room or something else hideous. I took pictures of my house a year ago to send in to their show. See #1 for the reason I have not sent them in yet.
I think Colin and Justin are totally amazing and their Scottish accents make me miss my Mom.

5) My favourite colour is purple. The kids in school thought I was weird that I did not like blue or pink or other boring colours. Yes, I liked Donny Osmond, still do. I wore many pairs of purple socks and went to summer camp once and slept with his picture from Tiger Beat magazine under my pillow.

6) I swear a lot. No big surprise to anyone who knows me. My mother did too. Kerry Freeman and I decided in grade 6 I think it was to swear. We were on the playground after school one day and decided together to start swearing.

7) Bad manners make me blind with anger and I pray that bad manners are one of the things people don’t think I have. I want to run a manners school for kids. This generation makes me crazy. My parents were hardcore about manners: eat with your mouth closed, talk softly, walk quietly etc. Ironic that my mother drank and swore like a sailor and my father thought (and still does) it was ok to answer the front door in his underpants.

8) I am going to post this on my blog. Everytime I write something on FaceBook or to my support group and copy it onto my blog I feel guilty that I am not giving everyone original material and being lazy about not spending the time on each separate medium.

9) I love to sleep but wish there were 24 hours in a day. I stay up very late each night ( go back to #1 to see what I do with that time) watching bad TV, surfing the web, working on my business and playing with bath products and stuff.

10) I am teaching myself to like taking baths. I own a company that sells Bath products and HATE taking baths. I wonder if I could make a fortune creating a bathtub that I found comfortable enough to stay in for more than 10 minutes

11) I think I am lazy, I NEVER get enough done in the course of the day to feel satisfied. Going to bed before everything is done feels like failure to me. See #9.

12) I have a very addictive personality but learned a lot about myself when I gave into cigarettes and cocaine. Cigarettes were cool and tasted good…Cocaine made my never quiet brain get quiet but never for long enough. I quit Cigs for my kid. I quit cocaine because it made getting anything done totally impossible and holy shit the people that I met while using it were complete morons. I don’t like morons.

13) I always feel like I have useful info to share with people that would help them ie: stop using sulfates in your hair and it will look nicer, you will run faster if you learn chi-running, you will lose weight if you follow the program I used to lose 40lbs, Your curly hair would look better if you learn my way etc etc. Now that I run a business that I can share info with people that will help them I feel guilty that I will make money helping them. I try really hard not to tell my friends about the stuff I know or can do that would help them because I don’t want them to think I am trying to make money off them. .. But then I get mad that they are doing stuff the hard way and wish I could help them… and then I feel guilty…. Which is why I suck at marketing my company.

14) I want to start a group for people with cancer in my area that helps cancer patients exercise together during and after treatment. My mom started a group for stay- at-home mom’s to exercise together and it is still running 40+ years later. I have an odd feeling the groups will end up being similar.

15) I like you, lots and lots of you. I cannot mention/tag all the people I like in this note. I have a blog post I want to write that makes all the people who read all the stuff I write to tell them this. See #1 about this… I have been thinking about this post for months….
On the flipside I am deeply, painfully sad and angry that I lost some people from my life when I got cancer. I have always been known as the person who stays in touch with everyone from all parts of her life. When I got sick I could not keep this up. FaceBook helped but I did not have the time to do it. I am really mad that some people just did not bother to keep in touch with me while I was sick.

16) I think I am not very smart. Although somehow I have managed to run a business for the last 8 years with no real education I still think I am dumb. I only barely made it through high school and failed out of college. In hindsight I know it was because I was bored and thought everyone else.. mostly my teachers were dumb. Sadly, since I was raised to believe authority figures are to be trusted I actually listened when those same teachers told me I was dumb…..

17) I wish I could sing more. I wish I was better at singing in public. I sing alone all the time. I was in a choir from the time I was 4 until I was about 28. I sang a few solos here and there but when I tried to sing at weddings and funerals and stuff I start to cry for some unexplained reason. I know for sure it is some deep emotional reaction I have no control over. I might need shock therapy so I can sing solo in public...

18) I think I took this exercise too seriously